Saturday, July 17, 2010

Something must be in the water... There are so many people getting pregnant. I'm not so much jealous, but more worried about when it's going to happen for us. I know that the time will come when it's supposed to...when God has planned it to happen...but what if Gods plan for us is not to have kids..I know that I need to be patient and trust Him, it's just eating away at me, ya know?
I am only human..I have wants, I have expectations...when truly I need to think of the desire that God has for my life, for our life, and the life of a child if we were to receive one..
I suppose I'm just anxious, and I know, I'm only 23..there is plenty of time for little ones, and at heart I'm still considered a little one. In my heart I'm just terrified that maybe I won't be able to have children...don't ask why I feel that way..I just do, and I hope and pray that I'm mistaken...

Just holding my niece, Reiya today..how much love I know I could and want to give a child just pulls on my heartstrings..whatever the plans are, I'm ready..I just have to remember there is a plan for David and I...I just need to wait and be patient..very patient...very very...lol

2 comments:

  1. It will probably happen when you are least expecting it. I know you will make a great mom. Hang in there.

    ReplyDelete
  2. my number one thing i wanted to do in life was become a momma!
    and the thought of not being able to ....especially after having a miscarriage..scared me to the bottom of my heart..down to my bones...

    i didn't know what i would do if i could not have kids...i mean i work in preschool..i love kids!!

    pray about it..let God know that you are giving this anxious feeling over to him and enjoy being a newlywed right now...
    God knows when your ready to have a little one.....and he has way more patience than i do..sometimes we just get ahead of ourselves!!

    ReplyDelete